QUOTE OF THE DAY : "Mein Fuhrer, I can walk!" - Dr. Strangelove seconds before the world is destroyed.

LINK OF THE DAY : The Smoking Gun.

No, not for a king,
Upon whose property and most dear life
A damn'd defeat was made.

Originality : The Lost Art.

Media in general has been going down the toilet for the past decade or so. Sure... there have been some excellent and original films made in the past 15 years... but think of all the schlock that's come out too. Studios are just churning out movies like clockwork, most of which are incredibly bad and unoriginal.

I'm not saying it's easy to turn out original content. It's very hard. There is a statistic somewhere that says there are only 125 basic plots a movie or story can have. That can't make it easy.

What I don't get is why they just keep turning out the unoriginal content. It's obviously just about the money. Logic would say... if it's not original don't make it. But when have logic and capitalism ever gone hand in hand.

Making shitty movies is one thing... but remaking movies is much worse. Especially when you remake a classic and turn out a piece of crap. There are too many examples of this to name... but here's the most recent attempt to remake a classic.

The Manchurian Candidate.



This classic 1962 John Frankenheimer film starring Frank Sinatra, Laurence Harvey and Janet Leigh is considered by many to be one of the top 100 films ever made.

I've seen it, it's a great film. It's about a Korean War veteran Raymond Shaw, who returns from the war a decorated hero, the odd thing is the other members of his platoon can't really remember what he did to win his medals. Several of his platoon mates start having strange nightmares about being captured and brainwashed by the Communists in Korea. This leads them to investigate Raymond's current activities... and a sinister plot begins to unravel.

It was a very controversial film at the time, given the tension between the US and the USSR, and was a very relevent film for the time.

The new film... the remake.... will star Liev Schreiber, Denzel Washington and John Voight, and will be directed by Jonathan Demme. Make no mistake these are all talented people... who have made excellent films in the past. But I say... Why fuck with a good thing ? There is no god damned reason to remake this film other than to make a quick buck on a marketable name.

Of course the idea of remaking this film would have been unthinkable even 5 years ago... it's only happening now because John Frankenheimer and Frank Sinatra happen to be DEAD! They'll be rolling in their graves soon enough.

There have been good remakes... Cape Fear comes to mind. But there have also been many bad remakes. Get Carter, Psycho, Mr. Deeds. The list goes on. It's just a damn shame to see the originals sullied by shitty remakes.

I can't stop Hollywood from remaking movies. All I ask is that they do the originals justice or don't even bother... Don't even consider it if you can't do it justice.

This is almost as bad as when MGM had plans to remake the Seven Samurai. And they still might... which sucks.

Do yourself a favour and check out The Manchurian Candidate, it's a quality film that really gets inside your head. Hope you can handle it though... it's in black and white. I know some people who won't watch black and white movies because they are in black and white. Just FYI it was made this way on purpose, they had color movies in 1962, but this was the way the director wanted the movie to be. Anyways my rage towards B&W haters will have to wait for another post.

It's a disgrace.

-Will

QUOTE OF THE DAY : "That's not true... That's impossible...... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOARRRGH !!!" -Luke Skywalker, upon learning Darth Vader is his father.

LINK OF THE DAY : The Happiest Website in the World.

Who can break from the snares of the world
And sit with me among the white clouds?



Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Crazy shit huh ?

Just sitting here listening to Radiohead. Good band. For some reason I used to hate them... Now I see how good they really are and love their stuff. I recommend you check them out if you haven't heard them before.

I'm going to try and avoid the long winded political soliloquies like yesterdays post. Just had to get some of that shit off my chest. If any of my American friends were offended... I'm sorry but I only speak the truth.

Anyways... I figured I would review Gozu, but now I've decided I won't. Well I'll just tell you a bit about it.

It was good, but made absolutely no sense. Very David Lynch'ish. It could only be categorized as a Yakuza/Crime/Horror/Drama/Comedy hehe. It's all over the place. Just so you know Gozu means CowHead in Japanese... And when the titular character shows up... You're not surprised by it at all. You're just like... "Oh... A cow headed guy... What do you know." Hope that gives you an idea of how fucked up the movie is. And that barely scratches the surface. Personally I liked it, thought it was a real mind fuck, and disturbingly hilarious. May not be everyones cup of tea though. Takashi Miike is a crazy guy... To say the least.

Well... I just did exactly what I said I wouldn't... Which was review the movie. Doh.

Meeting my Dad for lunch tomorrow, should be good... We will trade witty anecdotes, and discuss life, school, and the future. It will be good times.

And that as we say... Is that.

-Will

TORONTO INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL REVIEW
PART II : UNDERWORLD



An Exercise in Heavy Metal and Vampire/Lycan Love.

Half the fun of a film festival is the experience. The people you meet, and the good times in line.

The other half of the fun are the films.

Underworld is an example of a fun film. Not bad, Not Great. But entertaining none the less.

Len Wiseman's first directorial effort is a success at what it is. A Romeo and Juliet-esqe tale about a war that has been raging between vampires and werewolves for hundreds of years. Best desribed as a mix of Blade 2 and The Matrix, it has all the makings of good summer entertainment.... but wait it's September, seems like it should have been out a few months ago.

Kate Beckinsale does a bang up job as Selene. A vampire death dealer who's obsessed with wiping out the Lycans(werewolves) who killed her family hundreds of years prior. Scott Speedman is decent as the confused human caught in the middle. He spends most of his time writhing around, he's either tied down, being bitten by someone, or chained to something for most of the movie.

Good god though... Shane Brolly who plays Kraven ... is terrible. I'm sure he's a nice guy, but his acting is pretty mediocre in this film. He sticks out like a sore thumb.

The action scenes are pretty good. Very remincent of The Matrix. Lots of slow-mo, jumping and gunplay.... just not done as well as The Matrix.

Overall I thought it was... okay. I'm sure it will do pretty well in theatres.

I would give it a B- , 2 and Half Stars.

God damn ultra-nerds who stayed for the Q&A... ask a fucking relevant question instead of badgering the director about why the vampires had reflections.

Will "RoninKengo" Perkins

TORONTO INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL REVIEW
PART I : ZATOICHI



I was so psyched to see this movie, I woke up at 8 AM. It was Saturday and this was an unusual occurance for me.

I was going to see Zatoichi at 2:30 PM at the Elgin Theatre in the heart of downtown Toronto. Yes, it would be a good day.

I arrived at the Elgin at 12:15 PM, and was pleased to discover I was the first person in line. For anyone who was there, I was the fly bastard in the Scarface T-shirt and aviators. Several hours of waiting and some poutine later, they opened the doors.

Though I was first in line I still sprinted down the hallways of the Elgin, afraid some usurper fanboy would rob me of my rightful seat. Thankfully this did not happen, and I wasn't forced to drop kick anyone off the balcony. Front row centre on the balcony, perfect view, truly the best seats in the house.

After a short introduction, and a word from our sponsors the film began.

I don't want to give you a plot synopsis, instead I'll outline some of the reasons you should see this flick.

If you are a fan of Japanese cinema, samurai flicks, the original Zatoichi or Takeshi Kitano ... it is your duty to see this movie. I went to see it with two guys (Craig and Chris) who'd never seen a Kitano film, and little... if any Japanese cinema... and they were floored by the movie.

The action scenes are some of the coolest sword fights EVER put on film. Remember to bring water because your jaw will be on the floor during every fight scene. That's the only way they can be described JAW DROPPING.

The swordplay is lightning fast, bloody as hell and incredible to behold. You really get to see what a sword is capable of in the hands of a master like Zatoichi. Get ready for flying limbs and the sound of steel cutting through flesh and bone. The violence is by no means cartoony; but stylized and brutally realistic. Ah the Japanese and stylized violence... they're so good at it. I found myself disturbed and in awe all at once.

Brilliant action sequencecs aside, this movie will also have you laughing your ass off throughout. The humor is subtle at times, and slapstick at others. Kitano's deadpan wit as Zatoichi is classic. There is also an excellent comedic performance by Taka Gadarukanaru who plays the gambling addicted nephew of Oume.

The plot ain't bad either... dare I say a little Yojimbo/Sanjuro-esque. But hey it's a good example to follow. Rival gangs bossing meak townspeople and farmers around, Two mysterious and incredibly skilled swordsmen find themselves embroiled in the conflict and on opposite sides. With the entire film building up to their climactic duel. This is essentially the plot, but there are many twists and substories that make it more than standard fare. The premise may seem a little formulaic but it's execution is far from it.

With several subplots involving everything from revenge, honor, family and even sexual identity the movie is far from boring. Information about characters is revealed through slick flashbacks that work well with the rest of the film.

Takeshi Kitano is a very gifted director, but you don't need me to tell you that. Many scenes have little or no dialogue and instead the audience is given a simple beat or rhythm that builds into a full fledged score. Kitano's use of sound in this movie is superb.

The farmers pound the field as Zatoichi slowly trundles by, the beat of the farmers pounding continues and adds to the clang of armor and weapons as a group of soldiers marches past.

These rhythms then evolve into music and so on and so forth. It's a very cool effect, and Kitano uses it well in many scenes.

I also must mention the stellar badass that Tadanobu Asano (Who aslo stars with 'Beat' in Taboo, for those of you who didn't see it because you were afraid of gay samurai) plays in this film. The stoic ronin Gennosuke Hattori is a good man who has just had a streak of misfortune. He is a dishonored masterless samurai, with a sick wife and no means to support her. He is forced to do bodyguard work for the local gang. He doesn't want to do it, but if he has to kill a few people to help his wife get better... so be it. A stand out performance by Asano in this film.

A few criticisms though... The CGI used during the fight scenes is amazing for the most part, but there are a few instances where you can really tell it's a fake sword blowing through some hapless bastards chest cavity. Most of the time though the action is too fast to notice these small problems anyways.

As well... the big dance number at the end... went on a little too long I think. But that's just me... I'm not a song and dance guy... so sue me.

A few points of interest: WARNING SPOILERS AHEAD.

One of the Geisha assassins is a man, baby ! If you couldn't tell pretty quickly... well maybe it's time you reevaluate where you stand sexually.

They don't call Pops and Gramps... Pops and Gramps for nothing.

The final confronation between Zatoichi and Gennosuke is lightning fast and Gennosuke gets his ass whooped !

END Spoilers

This movie was so much fun... I highly recommend you catch it if you can.

A+, Two Thumbs Up, Four Stars !

Will "RoninKengo" Perkins